ramblings of Encouragement in the real world

Do you ever have moments where the words you speak to encourage others end up being just the ‘life breath’ you needed to get you through your own day? This has been happening to me a lot lately. What gets me is the truth I speak to others came out of me… but I needed to hear it… again. So often we learn things, even well enough to internalize them & live it out… but we forget that we know them when we are discouraged & we simply try to ‘journey on’ feeling worn out & pulled down by the weight of ‘toughing it out’. I’m not sure I’ve learned to do it differently, just that today I am acutely aware of the truth that is IN ME & I’m choosing to allow it to encourage MYSELF in the Lord today. One day at a time, we all are learning new things, & then some days we are re-learning all over again. Like reading a favorite bible verse & suddenly getting completely new & fresh revelation from it… Today I choose to learn good & beautiful things, not forgetting the ugly & evil I have learned – but rather replacing it & vowing to leave it behind me. “Not turning back, moving ahead – I’m moving, moving forward!” (love that song!)

My recent Facebook musings that were meant to encourage others & have also encouraged myself:

Encouraging yourself in the Lord-

Last night someone asked “What do you do?” My answer is simple: I do the things that I have heard/seen with my Father in heaven. (John 8:38) (ie. serve the poor, care for widows & orphans, etc.)

“And it came to pass, at the time of the offering of the evening sacrifice, that Elijah the prophet came near and said, “ Lord God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, let it be known this day that You are God in Israel and I am Your servant, and that I have done all these things at Your word.” -1 Kings 18:36

Know that your Father has gone before you & made every way straight, including this one…

Yes, the price of a life (cost of adopting our daughter from China) – but the truth is… she’s worth that & so much more to her Father in heaven. We know that He wants to give her good gifts, we know that He led us to her & so we trust that He will also provide the ransom for her rescue!

Encouraging others in the Lord-

When talking with others about their faith walk (or lack thereof), it’s important to hear them out & get a feel for where they’re coming from. A person’s background tends to really color how they think & what approach will either interest them or turn them off the topic completely. Listening to them also give you time to pray & wait on the Holy Spirit for the right words – a critical step! Usually it helps the other person to relax & know that you are a trustworthy friend that will love them unconditionally, if you interrupt at every turn they will begin to feel like it’s the ‘all about YOU’ show instead of you & them sharing together… Never come right out & tell people they are wrong about their faith/theology unless you already have a long standing & trusting relationship – like a best friend… Anyone else you are ministering to will immediately shut down. Conversation over, no second chances. Try a more gentle way of showing them new ideas, allowing them to choose them for themselves.

It helps me a LOT to think of people as children who have never been taught. If I can choose to be gentle & loving in everything I say, then I will get through to them faster & with more impact than any other approach. Not sugar coating, but affirming the things they DO get right & suggesting new ways to think, as a new concept… like “have you ever considered what God was looking for when he created man? Do you think maybe he wanted companions that would be in relationship with him?” That might help a person rethink their idea that if they are a ‘good person’ they don’t need to really worry about reading the Word, praying or even knowing God enough to have any kind of relationship with Him.

It’s also very important to “speak life” into & about the situation. Especially when you talk to people you want to encourage & edify (teach). If they feel preached at though, they will say forget it, & then your conversation (& opportunity) is over. Listen to the spirit for the balance. Sometimes not talking & just hearing them out will give you so much more insight, for your prayers & for the next conversation. Treat every conversation as a divine appointment. Assume that God’s been working on their heart & that He will provide you with the right words that THEY need to hear…

I often think we over complicate talking to people. If we can simplify then we can hear the holy spirit telling us how to get to the heart of their issue. Rather than debate or argue… choose to teach in love… People get defensive & shut down when they think we are correcting them, but they listen when they feel affirmed because we are approving of something & then we slip in new ideas, challenging them to think for themselves & search the Word out for answers. Teaching them to apply God’s truth & Kingdom principles to their own lives. In essence, you wouldn’t spoon feed your 10 year old, you teach him to do that himself when he’s young. Likewise, you hope that the lessons you teach your 16 year old will help him choose wise actions when he’s working his first full time job at 25. What if he couldn’t choose well, because he had never learned to think it through for himself? Would he know what to wear? How would he wake up on time & find his way to work? Would he forget to get his lunch?

God has commanded that we make disciples, that can also go out and make disciples… He didn’t say to go out & correct people all day w/o teaching them how to self-correct. We don’t have time to be everyone’s Mommy right? So let’s remember to point to Jesus & teach them how to read the map, rather than being their personal guide while they sit in the backseat & stare out the windows of life, never learning to navigate or drive on their own. Don’t worry about reaching the masses, speak to people one on one, build relationship & walk through life together WITH them, in doing so you will make a disciple who will do the same. This is how we reach the world with Jesus’ hope & truth, by loving & teaching one by one. {1×1}

One last thing, an important thing I learned many years ago: If you feel you are in over your head with a conversation, like it’s gone beyond your personal training or knowledge of God (or the other person’s theology has you caught w/o an answer… ie. talking with a Mormon, Jehovah’s Witness or Muslim person etc.)… PRAY silently, find a graceful exit & seek Godly counsel from someone you trust! Take this as a chance for YOU to grow & seek out wisdom & training for the specific kind of conversation needed… We don’t send soldiers to the front lines without serious & extensive hands on training from masters of their skills… why would we try to fight a spiritual battle without the right tools & weapons or without excellent training? We are talking about the life/death of people’s souls. Let’s take it seriously friends!

Serving Others/Getting Hurt –

Q. – How is it that you can walk with people through the death of a child and siblings, the death of parents and in-laws, adoption of children, disabling injuries, marriages that are almost destroyed, drug and alcohol addictions, and when as soon as you say something they do not agree with, you are suddenly their ‘former pastor’??? How do we inspire loyalty?

A. – I know people that are living this daily, they are called to a community that didn’t ask them to teach them, doesn’t want to be challenged & pretty much thinks they have all ‘arrived’… being new in a town/country is lonely/hard enough, but each time they think Father has finally sent a true friend, they’ve been mistaken…  —  I have experienced this at times myself. In the midst of it, I was so blessed in growing even closer to Him. Looking back, I am blessed now, in how He is able to strengthen/protect our marriage/family in EVERY season, despite the adversity set up against it/us! As for loyalty, we need to point others to Jesus, not ourselves or our programs. If we can model loyalty to Jesus rather than man, then we are already halfway there. Like you would redirect a child, constantly be redirecting the people you serve. Remember to be a SERVANT leader as Christ is, & remember that if it is Christ they should be loyal to, then you can take it a little less personal when they walk away from you so easily. Let’s just pray they don’t completely walk out on HIM! We all need to be constantly re-learning to KEEP HIM as our BFF, our source & the only one we strive to please & be loyal to! Be encouraged friends, He SEES our struggle & He’s walked it Himself, He gives new grace for each day… Amen?!!

Bear with me friends, feel free to add your thoughts in the comments. I’m still learning all of this, I have certainly NOT ‘arrived’ yet! – So, it’s good to repeat it to you, as that helps me do it better myself! – I’d love to hear from you all, the truth is “Iron sharpens Iron”, we are meant to encourage & strengthen one another – just not made to depend on each other for our entire faith walk!

-JK

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2 comments on “ramblings of Encouragement in the real world

  1. Very good word! I so agree too – I’ve read back my old blog posts and it again blesses me and encourages me to keep going. Also reminds me of what to do – reminding me what where I’ve been and what I need to do to keep going, keep fighting. Thanks for posting this today!

    • You’re welcome Carol! It’s always wonderful to know that someone totally “gets me”! Hope your day gets better & better my friend… I’m off to bed now, it’s very late here! 🙂

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